Zoo

Yesterday I was a chaperon at Kimberly's field trip to the zoo. I use 'chaperon' lightly because in our school, parent involvement is very high. There were about 14 parents that volunteered to keep track of 23 or so kids. Because that's how we roll in the land of suburban bliss.

I was only in charge of Kimberly and one of her little friends. I must say that is was so much fun! The child I was assigned to was such a sweetie and I'm so glad that Kimmy and I got to spend the day with her. I made the girls hold hands because it was easier to keep track of one moving target versus two. They were so darn cute! They held hands and skipped everywhere. I'm proud to say that it worked because I didn't lose a kid. :D

I am proud of myself for actually letting her get on the bus and drive across town...on 3 different freeways...in a bus...with no seatbelt. I can't imagine not being there to chaperon though. I trust the teachers, I mostly trust the bus drivers, but I wouldn't trust another parent to make sure she didn't get lost. Is that awful? I know i have issues and irrational fears that the big bad world is going to swallow up my loved ones. My poor kids! They are going to have a crazy lady hovering over them until they are 18...or more like as long as I am breathing.

You're beautiful baby...

Kimberly is growing up into a little lady. Every day she is a little longer, a little smarter and more lovely with every breath she takes. Jeff always asks her, "How did you get to be so beautiful/smart/funny/cool?"

Her answer? "Because my Mommy made me that way!"

I took some great pictures of her last week during Spring Break. Have a look-see:


Even with self cut bangs and 2 missing teeth, isn't she sweet?

Oh, and yes she's rollerblading in the house...I gave her the job of distressing our wood floors.

what a big girl!

How did she get such beauty and grace?

Why from her mother of course!
Damn I'm hawt! :D

Easter doggy

Hannah has been pacing in circles for the last few minutes. She wants to go outside but normally she will look at me directly and give me a 'come hither and open the door' look. Today though she kept rubbing on my legs like a cat but wouldn't directly look at me. She had shifty eyes.

Here, look for yourself...

Notice the lowered head:

Looking toward me, but not at me:

I moved in closer and she gave me the cold shoulder:

Ah-ha! Miss thang was trying to smuggle an easter egg out of the house.

hey you can't blame a girl for trying!

Party time! Excellent!

Yesterday was Kennens birthday party! We had around 15 kids here and Kennen had so much fun playing with everyone. He is such a little hunny. We didn't to the kiddy pool like we had planned because it was a little chilly out but the kids ran and played and didn't fight...success!

Jeff cooked fajitas and our neighbor Mr. Brazil spent the time fervently crushing limes and ice for capirhinas (or however the fuck you spell it!). Those are d.a.n.g.e.r.o.u.s. I had half of one and I could feel myself getting inappropriately buzzed for my sons 3rd birthday party. I put it down and switched to wine. :D

Wine is much better for my image as a stay at home suburban Mom. Wine is the drink of choice amongst the ladies of master planned community's. It is our indulgence. Our dirty little secret. Our soft place to fall at the end of the day. Is 2 o'clock too early to drink wine? Yes, too early. How about 4 o'clock. Probably still too early. No, 6 o'clock is an appropriate hour...while cooking dinner...splashing a little into the beef gravy like Julia Child. She was a classy drunk.

pictures of the party coming later! :D

Picture time!

Here is a quick ode to Kennen:

Oh.
My.
Gawd.
Daddy and Kennen in their matching outfits!
Happy 3rd birthday buddy!

My baby is 3!

My sweet boy is 3 today. I feel like my heart is in a vice. Ugh that boy does something to me, I tell you. His party is going to be on Friday so today we are keeping it low key. Kimberly could never grasp that yes, today is her birthday but the big party will be on a weekend. This means that for the last 2 years, I have had a sullen and disappointed little girl on her actualy birthday. I'm not knocking my child, don't get me wrong. Her strength and her hunger to have the best and be the best will get her far in this world. She is so much like her Dad and I can see her being successful like him too.

Kennen has a different outlook though. Anything he gets he appreciates. This morning when he came downstairs, Kimberly and I were waiting to show him the gift and the cake sitting on the table. He had a huge smile on his face and pointed to his little chest and said, 'Me? For me Mommy?'

Kim and I sang to him and cheered him on while he blew out his candles. He opened his present, which was a set of walkie talkies in the shape of Spiderman. As I was struggling to get the two Spideys out of the grip of plastic, tape, and twist ties Kimberly said, 'Cool, we can share. Kennen can have the first one and then the other one will be for me.' Then Kennen said, 'yeah, You Kimmy then the other one for ME!'

Kim asked why he wanted her to hold the first one and I said because he is a good boy and likes to share. Kennen nodded and smiled. What a little honey.

After all the unwrapping and unscrewing of Spiderman's rear end to put the batteries in, I realized that I needed AAA's. I have about 50 AA's and one AAA battery. Damnit. Why do they even make AAA's anymore? I told the kids we had to go buy batteries and Kennen said, "Put Spidermans pants back on Mommy." Kimberly threw back her head and whined, "How are we even going to PLAY with them?" I sent her to her room.

No whining before Mommy has her coffee. And no being ungrateful on your baby brothers birthday.

la di dah

I have this problem. It usually isn't a problem for me, but my husband complains about it a lot. When I am cleaning, I tuck everything out of sight. Like I'll clean at night after Jeff goes to sleep and he will wake up in the morning and have no idea where his keys and his wallet are. Then he asks me and I will show him which basket/drawer/niche I've squirreled his stuff into.


The problem is that I designate new hiding places all the time, so sometimes things get lost.
Sometimes things like my camera upload usb cable. And then sometimes I have nothing to blog about because a picture says 1000 words, and since I dont seem to have any words lately...I could definetly use all the help I can get. I have extremely cute pictures of Kennen, great pics of Kim zooming down the sidewalk in the Plasma car and even picture of Jeff all crossed out and singing 'Jump' during our night of musical nostalgia at Bung Chows house this weekend. Oh yes, Patty busted out her cassette tapes.

But instead I am searching the archives of my own old photos. I had a dream about my Grandma last night, so here are some pics of a visit with them a few years ago. In my dream my grandma told me she hasn't left the house in a few weeks, and I was trying to convince her to take a cab and go eat dinner at Lubys. I told her that maybe she could meet another widow there to be her friend. I'm not sure why, but I can imagine a lot of of ladies eating alone at Lubys that would appreciate a new friend. Aaaaaaanyway, here are pictures of me, Kimberly when she was 1, my brother Steve, my grandpa that just died in January, and of course my grandmother.

Me and Grandma...I love to think that 1/4 of my grandma's genes are me!

Steve, Kimmy-girl, Me (why can't I find a shirt that fits?) and my amazing Grandpa. I miss him.

And random cuteness of my Kimmy-girl:

Ch-ch-changes!

Today is Kennen's last day of in home speech therapy. I'm sad actually. He is turning 3 next week and so will expire his therapy. He is going to continue on with speech classes at the elementary school and he is definitely ready for that next step. I'm sad though because his therapist has sort of become my friend. How do I go about saying...'so....do you want to hang out sometime?' I guess just like that huh? We shall see. Oh! That reminds me...I need to run to the store and get her a small fare-thee-well teacher gift.

On to another big change. This is a question for people that live in New York, Illinois, and Texas. These three states (among many more) have deregulated energy. You can choose which retail company to purchase your electricity through. My contract is up with Reliant (devil) Energy and now I have so many companies to choose from. There is one company called Ambit Energy and it is an electric company that will sell energy to you for the bargain price of 10.5 cents per kWh. How do they do it? Their 'marketing' is through a MLM (I think it means multi level marketing). Aka a pyramid scheme. You can pay $400 to become a 'consultant' and you make money by getting people to switch to Ambit as their electric company. You also recruit other 'consultants' underneath you and apparently that is where the big pyramid scheme money is made. Don't worry blog world. I don't want to become a 'consultant'. I can just be an electric company customer. Does anybody have an real deal experience with this company as their electricity dealer? I don't care if you are a consultant and have a great business opportunity for me to make money from home. I can sell used socks on ebay if I want to make money from home. I just want to know if you are a real customer or Ambit and really pay 10.5 cents per kWh.

Stressed out week!

Jeff just got home at 7:00am yesterday from his business trip to Brazil. I am so relieved but I have exhausted myself this week by being worried, stressed, and sad all while keeping a happy face on for my kids.

I really don't mind when Jeff travels...I actually think it adds a little something to our relationship. The whole being apart for 2 days and missing each other and then being happy when he comes home keeps things every so slightly spicy.

The longer international trips are rough. They quickly turn from 'spicy' to 'tumultuous'. He has his blackberry so I should be able to talk to him when I need to, right? But, him going out on the town in Campinas with his boss and not having cell phone reception (which means he didn't answer my 50 frantic phone calls...give or take) and then finally calling me at midnight and telling me to chill out does a number on my nervous system. I know I need to deal with my anxiety but he needs to not be a cruel prick and leave me hanging by a thread. That's all I'm going to say about that.

The rest of his trip, he focused on work and said sorry he was an idiot for not calling me and he didn't think it would be such a big deal to me, blah blah blah. He flew from Campinas to Rio and and finished up his work for the week and flew home Saturday night. I'm so glad he is home. This is where I need him to be and his travel is affecting me so much that I just want him to get a new job. But then I think that I only have to suffer for 2 weeks a year and the rest of the time, things are fine. I'm so frustrated. And mad. Really fucking pissed off actually and that is rare for me to stay mad longer than 15 minutes. Something has to give.

I took the kids to Dennys for dinner tonight. They got mac and cheese and little straw cups in the shape of rocket ships...'1 2 3 blastoff' is what the restaurant patrons and I got to listen to until the food came. I ordered breakfast and decided to have coffee with it. At 7:00pm. and.i'm.still.fucking.awake.shit.fuck.shit.

Thank you ShrinkingBoobies for this quiz. If any of you want to do it too, please post it on your blob and track back. Its a great way to get lost in blogland. :D

Five things on my to-do list today:

1. Make all the beds. I wonder how many will require me washing peed on sheets.
2. Clean my kitchen
3. Sweep and Mop my floors. I'm watching an infomercial for the Shark VX3. I think I need one.
4. Watch Lost
5. Isn't it sad that my only goal for the day is cleaning my house, but I broke it down into several bulleted points to make myself feel accomplished. This is why I need to go back to college.

Things I would do if I became a billionaire:

1. I would have a shampoo lady, and a shampoo sink. After my coffee in the morning, I would sit back and let someone wash, condition and then blowdry my hair for me.
2. Buy clothes that aren't from Target.
3. Oh Oh! I would buy a Target! And I would have the best 75% off endcaps of any other Target in the land.
4. Play with Jeff all day.
5. Buy a few houses.

3 bad habits:

1. Coffee in the morning, wine at night. Self medicate much?
2. true mom confessions
3. fast food

5 places I have lived:

1. Mesa, AZ
2. Flagstaff, AZ
3. Springfield, Il
4. Katy, TX
5. hmm...just 4 places? It feels like more.

Jobs I have had:

1. McDonalds
2. Receptionist
3. Bill Collecter
4. Waitress
5. Receptionist again

Things people don’t know about me:

1. If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret anymore
2. I love my husband more than my kids. Or maybe it isn't a secret...:D
3. It's 2:15 and y'all are asleep and I'm not. whaaa.
4. I nursed my first baby for 21 months.
5. Said nursed child now makes me coffee in the morning. quid pro quo.

winter doldrums be gone!

The sun has been shining. The mornings are starting to feel fresh and new with the sun coming up earlier and earlier. Our grass is turning green again, and our trees and shrubs are sprouting bright green shoots and leaves. I love the springtime. It's as if we get to see the earth wake up from a deep cold sleep and it makes me feel re energized and motivated.

I am craving change. I filled out an application to go back to school in the fall. It feels like a very large and very intimidating step for me. I am going to take it very slow by toeing the water and seeing how it feels with 6 credit hours to start with. I am still not going to graduate until Kennen is well into grade school and I'm okay with that. I would just like to be on my way to graduating by the time he starts school. I'm excited. :D I have a lot of extra time on my hands as the kids are getting older. Since Jeff and I are too chicken to have another baby, this will become my new obsession. It's cool because now I don't have to find out what a third baby will do to my body. Aw, no more babies still makes me sad I must admit. Gosh, I can't believe how quickly the whole 'new' Mommy stage went by. I have kids! Not babies! Weird! Sad! Exciting! Yeehaw!

Speaking of change...I painted my kitchen. It's Sanderling by sherwin williams, which basically is a mushroom color leaning toward the gray color pallet. This is good because we have western exposure in my kitchen and I'm really sick of 'hot' looking colors. It's tranquil and sophisticated. Happy girl I am. Oh! When I was at the store yesterday, I asked them for a satin finish and they gave me flat paint. It's fine and I actually prefer the way flat paint looks and I'm not going to paint it again, but do you think I could go in and bitch about it and get a free gallon of paint? They only charged me the price of the flat paint but I didn't check my order before I left. I have a hard time being a bitch, so i don't know if I can do it.

p.s. I will post pictures of my kitchen once I finish touching it up, wash my dishes, and put the switch plates back on.

p.s.s. My friends Kempy is having a girl! Just as I predicted...damn I'm good! Congrats!

p.s.s.s. Kennen was walking around this morning and said, "Poot (pronounced Poo-Tuh) Poot. I was wondering what he was talking about, but I was too busy to ask him because I had to get Kim ready for school A minute later I walked by the bathroom and Kennen was sitting on the toilet, he pointed a tiny finger to his chest and said, "I pooting Mommy!" That boy cracks me up!

The Diplomat

Last weekend at around this time, I was with the kids at NASA enjoying some 'space dots' ice cream. When we were in line, I told the kids the flavors and Kimberly chose 'rainbow dots'. I told her that it was rainbow sherbert and that it wasn't as tasty as real ice cream. She insisted on rainbow sherbert, I'm sure becuse it was the only flavor with the word 'rainbow' in it, and for Kennen I chose banana split space dots. The kids dug in and started eating. Kimberly ate some of hers and her face fell a little.

"It's kind of sour. But I like it...but it's sour." Then she reached across the table with her spoon and helped herself to a bite of Kennens banana split ice cream. Her face lit up and she said, "ohhhhhh, that's yummy!"

The kids kept eating but Kim was watching Kennen as he quickly and efficiently spooned his Space Dots into his mouth. She picked at hers for another minute or so in stony silence. All of the sudden, it was like a light bulb went off in her head.

"Kennen, do you want to taste mine? It's good!"

"No..." he said, as he continued to eat quickly.

"Really Buddy? You should try them. They are really good! Look at all the colors in mine! I will share with you." And with that, she pushed her bowl of ice cream across the table.

Kennen immediately dug in to her bowl while she said, "Mmmmmmmmmm, isn't mine good?" Kennen nodded.

Then ever so slowly, she stuck her spoon in Kennens ice cream and pulled it closer to her. Her eyes darted nervously to me to see if she was going to get in trouble for her trick. She took a few bites and with a triumphant smile she said, "I'm sharing Mommy!"