Two notes I recieved today pretty much ripped out my heart. The first was from my sweet Kimmy-girl. She's not so little anymore...10 years old with 10 year old girly problems. There is a girl in her class that has been squeezing her out of her 'group' of friends. She yells at her, tells her to mind her own business, tells her there isn't room for anyone else to play etc. My normally sturdy girl...big sister to two wild boys...wouldn't take any flack. But for some reason this girl has gotten under her skin and it really bothers Kim that she can't play with girls she was really close with at the beginning of 5th grade. We had a bed time heart to heart last night on how she could handle herself. She could stick up for herself. She could ask the girl what her problem was. She could steal her boyfriend (i kid, i kid!). She could cut her losses and focus on a really fun new group of girls. She was happy when I kissed her goodnight.
I went into her room to straighten up after the kids were all at school and she had left a note for me on her nightstand that said,
"For Mommy Only. (dont be mad at me)".
I wish that i would just fit in this world. Maybe there are other dimensions in the world. The world is a very strange place for me. Mean girl doesn't like me. I dont want her to be so mean to me anymore. I am a really nice girl. I dont know why she does this to me. She has put a spell on all my old friends. I'm happy she has not found my new BFF's. I don't want her to take over my life. Next time I will ignore her.
Jesus! Heavy stuff for a 10 year old. I totally cried when I read it. Freaks me out with her alluding to not fitting in...not just the school but in this world? I totally cried. I wanted to throat punch another 10 year old girl. How could someone be so mean to my child. I know I'm biased but she is seriously so fun.
I went and met her at school today for lunch and told her I read the letter. We talked about it and she pointed out who was who in her old group of friends. I also saw the new group of girls she was playing with. They were all talking, laughing, having fun, clamoring for Kim's attention etc. I honestly don't know how bad this is. She did write it at like 10pm and things always seem worse in the middle of the night. Nothing like the sunrise of a new day to brighten your perspective. For now I'm just going to meet with the school counselor to get advice on the best course of action. To mean girls credit...she seems like just another normal little kid. I dont think she is the debil, but maybe she doesn't know how she is affecting others with her actions. I would hope that if she knew she was keeping a person up crying at night, that she would feel bad and change. Although...not everyone is rainbows and sunshine. I'll pray for her. >;)
The second note was from my 3 year old's preschool teacher. She sent him to the directors office because he was being such a little shit-ass. My interpretation of her saying he was inconsolable and crying in the hallway. He is such a hard and naughty little boy. I'm having flash forwards of more principal visits and exasperated teachers. Why o why did I get the most difficult child on the face of the planet? Oh how can I describe my little tyrant? He is independant, very driven, smart as hell, determined, alpha, pissy, sassy, etc. Basically he is a 35lb version of my husband that is stuck with a primitive 3 year old brain. Here is an example of how a normally good quality in a human being goes wrong when you are 3:
Independant: He wipes his own ass, but since he's 3 and primitive he unrolls one long piece, wipes, then rolls the tp back up.
I just dont even know what to add to that. I dont know what to tell his teacher. How about, "Yeah, I know he's a pain in the ass. Good luck with that." I have decided though that he has been extra bad after winter break. I am doing what is referred to as, "tomato staking". He has to be glued to my hip 24/7 because I cant trust him to behave on his own. If I stake my tomatoes properly when they are young, they will grow into tall strong plants that will yield great bounties. Dear God please let that boy grow up right.
Speaking of tall and strong...Kennen is tall, strong and beautiful. My simple child of the day. Thanks you for that buddy. :D