I'm a happy girl...

Isn't she lovely?

The Hunt

Jeff and I have been car shopping today.

We saw the one I wanted at a dealership and they let us test drive it by ourselves. Does anybody else think that is weird? Is that a new thing? Or is it just something they have always done for the married with kids crowd? Do I look more trustworthy than I did 6 years ago when we bought out last car? Maybe it is a successful sales pitch. I told him that I couldn't test drive it but would come back later because I had to pick up Kim and two of her friend off the bus for a playdate. He told me to take it home and take all the time that I needed. At first I thought he was being nice, but really it is a brilliant sales trick.

"Take it home. See how it looks in your driveway." That's what he said. And when we got it home, it looked damn good in my driveway. I agreed to stay home while Jeff took the truck back to the dealership to see if he could get a good price. I had fifty kids running around playing while my mind was buzzing with the thrill of possibly getting a new car.

Jeff called a few hours later and said that they wouldn't come down in price and that the payments were too high. He siad we would talk more about it tomorrow and that he was sick of car shopping. It's okay. I was disappointed at first but whatevs. I poured myself a glass of sympathy wine (instead of celebratory) and sat on my driveway talking to my neighbors.

bummer

Then can you guess what happened next? My baby turned the corner in a beautiful 2007 Tahoe! Holy shitballs, he actually did it! He tricked me...surprised me if you will! Ha ha, and then Kimberly asked him, "Daddy why did you lie?"

"This isn't a lie lovebug, this is a SURPRISE!"

hellz yeah it is!

It's glorious! I know that it's just a machine. A thing. Is it bad that a thing can make my heart race? Oh and what I want to know is that if it is so bad for the environment, why do they make it feel so damn good to drive. I'm in shock. I am so happy and so grateful! I'm giddy! I can't sleep. I want to go and drive my new truck and I'm thinking, 'where can I go at 11pm? How about Walmart! Yes! I think I need more milk!"

Plasma Car

Kennen got a Plasma Car for his birthday from grandma and grandpa this year. It's awesome because you propel it forward by moving the handle bars left and right. The best part is that it can hold up to 250 lbs so my new favorite pastime is giving my kids (and the neighbor kids) plasma car rides down the driveway. It gets going at a surprising and almost treacherous speed. When they were visiting last week, Kennen and I showed Grandma and 'Papa' how we roll:

vroom...


whee (yep I'm all elbows and knees)


giving a boy a helping hand

Critter

This morning Hannah Shazama Hotlant Montana woke me up because she was barking like crazy from her crate. It's was only 6:00am so I yelled for her to shut up and I dozed for another hour or so. When I finally let her out of her crate at 7:00am, she ran to the front door and barked again.

"Shut up dog!" ugh. I threw her out into the backyard.

When I finally went out the front door to put Kimberly on the bus, this is what I saw! WTF? At first I thought it was an angry neighbor sending a message. People kind of hate my house around these parts because me and my neighbors yell at the speeding cars. We are kind of obnoxious and I can understand someone not liking me and counting the days until we put our house up for sale (like when hell freezes over). I never thought though that I would become victim of a sand dumping hate crime.


It turns out though that it is just a regular old Texas critter that is trying to squat on my property.


See? There's the hole!


Wait...boys! Could you tell Miss. Stella where the hole is? Oh! There it is!


So I have a friend living amongst the roots of my front garden. You can't really blame a critter...it's a lovely garden. I got a little camera happy this morning so have a look-see.

A month ago, almost everything was half the size. Miracle-Gro really does work apparently.


See? Look how big my elephant ears are! My feet are huge. Like literally a foot long. And they almost look dainty next to my elephant ears. Almost.

This is not a big pot leaf. It's Plumeria! Yes like the flowers they use to make Hawaiian leis.
These are my lantana's under my baby oak tree. They were literally 3 inch sticks poking out of the ground just a month ago.


Hibiscus...


Geraniums...



On another note, today was day one of car shopping. I went by myself to do some leg work and played the whole 'kept woman' role. You know, where I take the pressure off myself by saying things like, "I need to ask my husband,". It kind of backfired though. The guy helping me was an ASSHOLE. Well, I guess he just treated me like an idiot wife that was wasting his time. But honestly would a woman pound the pavement in heels in the rain if she wasn't going to buy a car in the next week or so. Or a month at least?

Now I'm in a bad mood. I wish Jeff would just go buy me the damn car and put a bow on it and park it in the garage. Do you hear that baby? Just surprise me! :D

Yeah right. He rarely reads my blog so i will have to *tell* him to surprise me, therein voiding all aspects of the 'surprise'. Oh well.

Thank you Dub-ya

Kaching! Our president is a moron and I know that there are a lot of people that say the stimulus package is a bad idea, but I would like to extend a personal thank you our commander in chief for the $1800 that I found in my checking account this morning. Oh, and I would like to thank the social security random number gods for giving my husband a ssn that ends in a number between 00 and 20.

Now I'm off to take Hannah off to the groomers to get her furrr did.

p.s As long as I am talking politics, I would like to please ask Reverend White to STFU! You are blowing it for your boy Obama. Don't you realize that your words are poison and that if Obama doesn't make it then the choices will be McCain (dinosaur) and Hillary (evil).

I think it's already too late though.

The carpet doesn't match the drapes...

Tonight I drew a scorching hot bath for myself. Why scorching hot? It's the only way to keep the kids out of my tub! :D I'm smart.

It didn't keep Kim from hanging out with me in the bathroom while I was reading 'Lipstick Jungle' (thanks for loaning it to me Tara!). I caught her staring down into the water...then she asked a few questions about *ahem* hair *ahem* on bodies. I told her that's just what Mommies look like.

"So...then...do black Mommies have white hair down there?"

l.m.a.o.

swimsuit shopping

I think this is the only kind of shopping that all women hate. The lighting is always terrible but the mirrors are everywhere and you end up seeing angles of yourself that you wish you could erase from memory.

And I didn't have anyone but Kennen with me so I took pictures on my camera phone...I highly recommend it! Then I got dressed and sat down and made my decision off of how the pictures looked. It gave me much more insight on what styles/colors look best on me.

I tried on about 10 different swimsuits and basically chose the one that sucked the least. Well, there was one other one that I really liked but it was yellow and my pasty white ass looks nasty in yellow. I can't believe that I stopped exercising 2 months before summer. We are having a crawfish boil/pool party at Jeff's boss's house this weekend and there is really nothing I can do to make my cellulite go away in 2 days. Oh well.

Kennen has been a huge brat the last few days. I think he is going through grandparent withdrawals. And he wants nothing to do with me. Aww, right as I typed that, Kennen just came over and layed his head on my shoulder. Okay...I guess he still loves me a little.