Sunday, January 30, 2011

Checking in. :D

Tonight I have the glorious luxury of having a laptop to blog on. Ever since the unfortunate death of my old laptop, I have been stuck on just my iphone for all of my internet enjoyment. I'm greatful for my 3g network and autocorrect...but it's no qwerty keyboard!

Lets see...what's new? Griffin is a happy healthy 18 month old. He's walking, talking, throwing fits and stealing everyone heart around him. He has a determination about him that I admire. He is contstantly having 'big kid toys' taken away from him but despite being told no a zillion times per day, he is still relentless. He wants what he wants and he never gives up. It can be annoying but I admire that and I see a lot of Jeff in Griffin. Self starter. Arrogant. Charming. All those things that make me swoon, lol.

Kennen is impressing me in kindergarten. Ever since he has speech/balance/development issues, I always assumed he would be behind. It's funny because I went into his parent-teacher conference ready to hear the worst. He is ahead of his class as far as reading and knowing his sight words. He doesn't need speech therapy anymore. The only thing he doesn't say correctly are his 'L's" but that is still within the normal realm of kindergarten kids. He is enormous! He is 65lbs and wears a size 7/8. He is very tall and lean. He has my heart as always. I don't have a favorite's just impossible buuuuut. He's very special to me. :D

Kimberly, oh my Kimmy-girl growing up so fast. She has been developing her social life. I am really trying hard to fight my instinct to tell her she's not allowed to have friends that I don't choose for her. It's annoying when she has girls calling and asking her to play or sleep over every weekend. She's just a baby...a mere 8 years old...too young for sleepovers, right? Apparently not. I'm learning to let go just a tiny bit. She had a slumber party last night and I was up between the hours of 2am-6am and more than once I worried about Kim. Was she having fun? Was she warm? Did the smoke alarms in the house she was staying at have fresh batteries? Was the father of her friend a pedophile? Would she pee the bed and become the laughing stock of third grade? Of course she just had fun and was her happy strong self when I picked her up. No worse from the wear and very happy to have a night with her girlfriend.

The huz. We just celebrated 9 years of marriage a few years ago. I bought him a Coach wallet and he cooked me dinner, pampered me and bought me 2 dozen roses. I had all these ideas of tucking in the kids early, sharing a bottle of wine, savoring our steaks and salad. Instead we had kids begging for steak too, crying toddler, barking dog, and general pandemonium. It was fun. I love the noise. He has been working a ton lately...but honestly making more money than ever so no complaints here. So odd that I married a waiter and now Jeff is so successful. I always knew he was smart and driven...but yeah, I must say it's a nice yet unexpected bonus that he takes such good care of our little family.

Me? I'm good. My anxiety...which I may or may not have really blogged about in the kind of chilling out. I'm not sure why. Maybe having a baby to dote on is good for my mental health. Please take note people...if I ever suffer some kind of amnesia or dementia, please give me a baby doll and tell me it's my child. Being a mother gives me a peaceful easy feeling. My UC is in the shitter. I'm swallowing handfuls of pills a day and I'm only minimally controlling my symptoms. I even met with a colo-rectal surgeon a few weeks ago to discuss removing my colon. I'm sick of the pills, I'm sick of the pain...bah I'm just over it. But then I went to the surgeon and my vanity got the best of me. I don't want an ostomy even if its temporary. I don't want the nasty vertical scar on my abdomen. I had three perfect pregnancies with no c-section scars and no stretch marks. I would hate to ruin one of my better assetts by slashing it up with huge scars. I did find a sort of famous surgeon in my city that does laproscopic surgery and if I did need a total colectomy, I would go with that guy. But I don't think I am there yet with my disease. I think the surgery and then living with a jpouch (a rectum fashioned out of my small intestines and hooked up to my bung hole) would be better than what I'm living with. I'm back on prednisone, along with my colazal and 6mp, and I'm feeling pretty well. I'm getting fat again though so I'm tapering sooner than later. Oh! I almost forgot...I have another colonoscopy on Wednesday. The last time I had one, my Dr. hospitalized me. i had the last procedure done in the hospital so it was easy to admit me. This time I am smarter. I am going to an outpatient clinic so she can't admit me. Muahahahaha! I don't have time for another hospital stay. I'm much better than last time though so I don't anticipate that she would admit me but just to be safe...outpaitent clinic it is!

Speaking of getting fat. I'm going to join weight watchers this week. Boo. Hiss. But it's time. I tried on swimsuits already and it was pretty scary. All of the sudden, my Mothers reflection was staring back in the mirror. Cellulite and all! I need to lose 20 lb's stat!

Wow it feels great to blog. I need to buy a laptop. I need to buy a laptop. I need to buy a laptop.